Monday, April 19, 2010

I'm NOT Sorry If This Offends You


I was at the grocery store early this morning (like usual)….Today when I was checking out the lady in front of me was complaining…shesh really? It’s only Monday..anyways she was complaining about how ungrateful her children were…esp when it came to food. She told them she wasn’t going to buy anymore food until they ate all the other stuff. She said she was sick of wasting food (ok I get this part), but she said finally they were down to nothing and so she had to shop. She said ‘my house is a mess too because what am I …? Everyone’s maid?’ Umm yeah you kind of are. I mean no, your kids don’t have to be lazy and selfish and not take care of their things or help pick up messes, but yes you are …maid, cook, child care provider, chauffeur, dry cleaner, garbage man, pooper scooper…you see my point I’m sure I’m missing something. Heck fire, what did she think the job description of Stay at home Mom and Wife entailed….? Sitting on her butt all day and complaining?

I got asked one time: "What are you going to do once the kids are in school or grown and gone from the house? "


My job is never ending no matter who is home during the day with me. I will still need to wash sheets and towels. The clothes will still need to be laundered. I will still need to go to the grocery store to prepare meals for the week. I will still need to dust/mop/sweep/iron/scrub toilets/do the baseboards/take out the trash/collect the mail/clean fridge out/wipe down appliances.....
the list could go on.

My time is more important than any dollar amount I can bring to my family. Are we rich? Heck no! Do we struggle? At times, but that is why we budget and don't live beyond our means. I would love to have extra cash lying around to buy my hubby that new pickup truck he wants...or buy my kids the latest and greatest toys, but I can't. I want my family to know how much more important family is than material things. Those material things don't last..it's a quick fix. Something newer and better or faster is sure to come out before the dust collects, but yet family never gets old or outdated. My point is...my job is never ending and I knew this when I signed up for the task. I do my "JOB" with a happy heart and can't wait to spend the rest of my life doing it! I know that when I serve my Husband I am serving and pleasing God. That is all I could ask for. I want to honor my family and raise my children to love God. I pray that by example they will grow up to be strong ppl.

As for my oldest daughter? She wants to be just like me. Here in the home serving her family. She sees me being a SAHM with a smile on my face and love in my heart. I am honored that she would take after me. I know her husband will know how blessed he is to have a woman by his side honoring and serving him too!


When the kids are grown and out of the house starting their own families I will still be the SAHW my husband needs and has come to depend on.
I have given up nothing to be what I am today. It makes my heart hurt to hear other mother's say they are bored...or that they will not give up who they are to stay home...or that they need to prove to the world/other men that they can too work and have a family.

Men and women are designed differently for a reason. A man's body was built for hard work and war. A woman's was made for birthin them babies (grins) and tending to the home. We have a gentle feminine side and men have the rough and rugged side. Thank goodness for that...
I love making my home a place my husband wants to come home to. The place he craves at the end of the day. I love seeing his worries fall off his shoulders when he enters the door to his home knowing he can sit and relax with his family b/c I have done everything to make that possible. So what will I be doing once the kids are gone? Exactly what I am doing now!
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34 comments:

Neely said...

I think its wonderful that you stay home with the kids and honestly they will probably be better off because of it. So for lack of better phrasing screw anyone who gives you any crap for it! HAPPY MONDAY :)

Semi-Slacker Mom said...

I love this post! Very well said/written.

I was once asked what I would do when the baby went to school. I said, "probably catch up with the laundry".

Genesis said...

you are awesome :)

Tara said...

Amen, sista'!!!!! Well said!!!!!

Mrs. A said...

very well said and one of the strongest and most well thought out arguments for stay at home moms I've ever read.

Aly @ Analyze This said...

Amen to that!! And I know you are an amazing SAHM!! Your kids are sooo lucky to have you!

Kelly Marie said...

You make some (and by some I mean ALL) great points (: Enjoy your Monday lady!!

Angie S said...

LOVE THIS POST!

I TOTALLY agree with you!

I love my job and take it very seriously!!

You said it well lady :)

Slamdunk said...

Well written and something that needs to be said. I think underappreciated is the term for stay-at-home-mom.

Slightly Southern Belle said...

Well said!

You are a very inspiring woman, & I look up to you and all SAHM's!

Short Southern Momma said...

Great post mama!! This coming from a working mama who HAS to work. ;-)

Hope your having a great Monday! xoxo

Danielle said...

I really like this post. It also hurts me to here people say they are bored, tired, etc. of being a SAHM. Moms like me, who have to work, really appreciate those who know how good they have it to be a SAHM.

xoxox

Hello! I'm Kate. said...

My mom has a law degree & gave up a law career to be at home with her 5 babies. Someone asked her, "Can I have your law degree since you obviously aren't using it being at home with your kids?" I was standing right next to my mother & I almost slapped this woman! Moms use their educations everyday when troubleshooting illnesses or making budgets or figuring out recipes etc etc. Great Post today Laura!

Christi said...

Awesome post! I too was a SAHM until last year. I was blessed to be able to get a nursing job at the school that both my little ones were starting at. I really, really miss being home too! I'm sure one day I'll go back to my favorite job, but for now, I love being here with my babies.

Jenn @ WestSacHoney said...

PREACH on sista! I wish I could be a SAHM I enjoy doing all of the above minus dishes. I don't like dishes. And by doing the baseboards do you mean wiping them down every few weeks? Because I thought I'm the only crazy one that does that.. I'm still pretty sure I am.. Our lab leaves hair everywhere and especially on the baseboards! Keep on preaching!

Mrs. Muffins said...

I feel the same way. All I ever wanted was to be a good mom and wife. No amount of money compares to the way I feel when both of them are with me, happy, healthy and safe.

xx

LeAnna said...

Ever since being VERY young, I've always known that I wanted to be a SAHM, and I've always gotten flak for it. But, I don't care. Women were made to be there for their kids, and IN their home, and that's that! Preach it, sister!

Clementsville: Population of 4! said...

LOVE this post and I believe everything you are saying... if I did not have to work, I would not be doing so, but we are making preparations for me to not be doing this forever and one day soon will be able to focus my life 100% to the ones I love!!!!

Nic said...

AMEN....AAAMEN!!! I totally agree with you!! Been thinkin about a post like this for awhile! Great Job.

Pippy said...

Claps!
Very well said! Great post!

Sam said...

Great post. It's my absolute dream to become a SAHM. I hate that working mom's kind of frown upon it like that job isn't as important or something. In my opinion, it's *more* important. Things get done around the house that need to get done, you don't have to ship your kids off to daycare, the values that YOU want are instilled into them... I think if more people had stay at home mothers, the world would probably be a better place. My mom was a SAHM, and I may not always be thrilled with myself, but I am VERY thankful that she was able to instill values in me that keep me on the "straight and narrow". I don't think I'm an angel, but if I'm any good at all, all credit goes directly to my mom, who had/has, what I believe, is the best job in the word.

Not to say that working mothers aren't good parents, or that SAHM's are better or whatever.. But I think both occupations have value, and no one from either "corner" should pass judgment on the other. If it works for your family, than who is anyone else to question it?

But yeah, I definitely aspire to be a SAHM. I'm a business major just until I find Mr. Right.

Awesome post, Laura! :) Have a great week!

Sarah @ 365 Glimpses of John Parker said...

You have been reading my mail! Sometimes I feel so discouraged being a SAHM. I need to buck-up and realize what an investment we are making in our family by my staying home. I'll be linking this up to my blog post today. Thanks for putting things into perspective.

Together We Save said...

Was was lucky enought to stay home when mine were little... as they aged I had to get a job outside of the house. I miss being home with my girls.

Annie said...

perfectly said lady!!
i pray when the time comes i will get to be a sahm! :)

Taylor @ The Undomestic Momma said...

YEAH!!!!!!!

Jordan said...

I have absolutely nothing against SAHM! But it's something that I probably wont do. I don't have kids, but right now I have no desire to stay home. I am going to college, paying good money, and it's something I really want to do! My mom worked and we turned out just fine! She spent as much time as she could with us after school, on Fridays (she had them off), and on the weekends. She was (and still is) a great mom!

Don't hate me! I honestly have NOTHING against SAHM, it's just not for me! :-)

Erin said...

Do your thing! I hope other moms (myself included one day) have the courage and grace to take the attitude you have and do right by their families. I think there's more than one way to do ti, but what a witness to put aside other things and serve your husband and in so doing, God.

carissa @ lowercase letters said...

amen! it is such a blessing and a gift to take care of your home, children and husband! i'm so thankful to be doing this. i was definitely made for this. oh, and i adore the title of this post!

Free2bMommy said...

You know what? I hate when moms complain about those things too! I worked 12 hour days for my "dream job" and never saw my kids or husband. When I did get time off, I was too tired and stressed to be a good wife and mother to my family. It was then that I realized, no matter what my job paid...it wasnt enough. I have been at home with my kids for a few weeks now, and I think about how lucky I am to be home with them and to do household things. I enjoy doing for my family too! Love your honesty!

Dee
http://www.free2bmommy.blogspot.com/

Casey said...

All I can say is Amen to everything. I agree with what you wrote 100%

erin said...

I, too, am a SAHM. it's tough, but i wouldn't change it. we willingly make sacrifices so that i can be at home. i don't think people understand what goes into staying at home. is there magically milk in the fridge? does your shampoo refill itself? bills need to be paid. the floor needs to be swept there are sooo many little things that add up to a non-stop day.

~jacquelyn said...

i completely believe that if you're going to do something, do it for God. so if you're staying home-- let it be a way to serve God, and your family that He's blessed you with. not yourself. and if others chose to work, pray they do the same.

i never thought i'd stay home, but i've been home with just my husband for a year... i'm so thankful to be going back to work part-time because i've learned to LOVE my time at home, and LOVE my job as a way to love on others (i'm a hair stylist, its so fun & uplifting) i feel so blessed to have the perfect balance for where we are in our life/marriage right now!

lots of working women work with the wrong heart, and lots of sahm's stay home with the wrong heart. its so great to be at peace and joyful about the opportunity you've been given!

Amiee said...

You describe SAHMs so well. My sweet little princess also told me recently that when she grows up, she wants to be a mommy just like me. There is no amount of money or personal satisfaction that a job could give a mom than to hear something like that!! Thanks for saying what so many of us want to!!!

Secret Mommy said...

Oh, I just couldn't agree more! I adore being a stay at home mother and wife for my family. Best. Job. Ever.

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