(this list is not my own...I copied from a list of 100 from a blogger over at Lisa-Jo Baker)
funny how this list can be for millions of mommies everywhere!
70 Ways You Know You’re a Mom
- You are pretty much embarrassment-proof.
- A trip to the grocery store alone is your idea of a spontaneous getaway.
- You buy enough milk on a weekly basis to sponsor an entire dairy farm.
- When you put on make up the kids get excited that you’re all going out.
- If you don’t change the toilet paper roll, it doesn’t get changed.
- You can’t remember what the words “personal space” mean.
- You use photo shop for removing boogers more than for removing blemishes.
- You wash the same load of laundry at least twice before you remember to empty it.
- You can’t remember a time when you didn’t drive a minivan/suburban.
- Lugging the baby carrier is your idea of a workout.
- You listen to your kids’ favorite tunes even when you’re driving by yourself
- You can’t remember the last time you ate a meal while it was still hot.
You wish there was drive through everything.
- You can do 18 things all at the same time.
- You consider going to the bathroom by yourself the height of luxury.
- You can change a diaper in the pitch dark.
- You know how badly stepping on a piece of Lego can hurt.
- You have an entire Pinterest board full of crafts you will never get around to actually doing.
- You forget the names of your children.
- You think wrestling alligators would be easier than getting kids in bed on time.
- Your kids ask you what the iron is for.
- You spend more on carpet cleaning products than make up.
- You actually own a product called KIDS N PETS Stain & Odor Remover.
- Your husband tells you it isn’t worth buying anything nice until the kids move out to college.
- You cry with happiness when one of your children consents to eating broccoli.
- You tell yourself pizza has all the food groups.
- You haven’t slept in a decade.
- You have clothes in every size under the sun
You obsess over whether or not you remembered to sign that permission slip.
- Coffee is one of your love languages.
There is often an extra tiny person sleeping in your bed.
- You will never ever be able to sort, process or print all the photos you take.
- You would rather have someone help you with the laundry than anything else in the world.
- You know the names and super powers of every, single Marvel character ever created.
- You loathe happy meal toys.
Your kisses have magical, healing properties.
- You wish they had GPS for kids.
- You aren’t afraid of anything.
- You’re afraid of everything.
- You have sung the same song a trillion times.
- You have several story books memorized.
- You cook as much with the play kitchen as the real one.
- The curl at the nape of your baby’s neck can leave you undone.
Your Instagram stream reads like a love letter to your children.
- Your “desk” is surrounded by a constant stream of my little ponies, Darth Vadar and candy wrappers.
- Your idea of luxury is when someone else unloads the dishwasher.
- You daydream about a land where women go to the bathroom alone and don’t have to narrate what they’re doing in there.
- You have made s’more on a campfire and on the kitchen stove.
- You’ve convinced your kids that vacuuming is a “game.”
- Some days watching them is like seeing your heart do somersaults in front of your very eyes.
Super glue is your best friend.
- Cereal is a breakfast, lunch, and dinner kind of food at your house.
- About the last thing sofas are for is sitting on.
- Your computer keyboard has permanent marker scribbled on it.
- You loathe having to match socks.
- Some days you’re tempted to take off running after the ice cream truck.
- Cutting a tiny person’s finger nails terrifies you.
- You worry that Flintstones vitamins are the only thing standing between your kids and scurvy
- You carry spare lollipops in your purse.
- By “purse” you actually mean “diaper bag.”
- Your kids use your smart phone more than you do.
- You know the precise shape sandwiches should be cut up into.
- You and your daughter cry, laugh and bond over popcorn and Anne of Green Gables.
- You think you can cut hair.
- You discover you can’t actually cut hair.
- You do more multitasking in an average day than any CEO.
- You’ve clocked hundreds of miles of carpooling.
- Your body is soft in all the right places and perfect for comforting and cuddling
- You pray. About everything. Because you’ve learned you can hardly control anythin
- Your job description could fill an entire book.